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Football betting tipsby Ben, last updated 2007-08-16 20:22:40Gerry's PicksBy Gerry McDonnellWhy fight the hand that kneads you?The mobile phone has been heralded as a great invention, but I automatically frown upon any tool that encourages spousal interaction. I remember my feeling of angst as my circle of friend embraced the technological breakthrough. Even my old man joined in, and he's a complete technophobe; he once sold his television because a little fellow in the corner of the screen was making hand signals towards him. The wife shares my disdain for this evil apparatus. I really felt for her when she realised her fingers were too chunky for the keypad: she wasn't too upset though, she has the same problem with the landline. After several years of steadfast resistance, I finally caved. I'm now the proud owner of a phone that can take photos, record video, play music, cook dinner and nip down the offy; the only thing it can't do is make a telephone call without crackling like a pensioner. My decision to join the mobile revolution has paid off handsomely as I now have access to 'Frank TV'. I'm a real Lampard fan; I even subscribe to his popular video hosting website, YouTub. I'm looking forward to watching Frank strut his considerable stuff at Anfield on Sunday. Chelsea are an outstanding bet at 2/1 as Liverpool will be without their star performer from last week's win over the Villa; they'll really miss young Riley. Losing Wayne Rooney to a long term injury would normally be catastrophic, but when you have Carlos Tevez waiting in the wings, the blow is considerably softened. Tevez is almost a clone of Rooney, only without the excess fat; although I should congratulate her on landing her own TV show. Carlos is big enough and unquestionably ugly enough to nullify the loss of Rooney and Ronaldo, United must be backed at 4/5 to take the derby day honours. Jens Lehmann will still be seething after his opening day gaffe. The excitable German couldn't have looked more like a clown without a pair of giant shoes, a ginger wig and Fergie's nose. I'm raising a smile to the gargantuan 5/4 for an Arsenal win over Blackburn. Even though Bolton are pointless after two matches, the wife is convinced that Sammy Lee will stick with the same team for the trip to Fratton Park. I overheard her on the phone to her mother complaining that he's not big enough to touch the side. Pompey are a great shout at 10/11 to take advantage. I had to laugh when I heard Lawrie Sanchez accuse Arsenal players of simulation. Baird's challenge on Hleb was probably the most gratuitous trip since the Tony Blair era. I'm falling over the 5/4 for a Fulham win over the Boro. Roy Keane has launched an astonishing tirade against footballers' wives for wielding too much influence. What Roy fails to realise is that modern day relationships are a true partnership, where ideas are exchanged in a frank and open manner until the male gets knocked out. The 11/5 for a Sunderland win over Wigan is particularly tasty. Tottenham's transfer policy has left me decidedly perplexed. To spend £16.5m on what should be your 4th choice striker is particularly puzzling, especially when your midfield is in worse shape than Amy Winehouse. Derby have to be backed at 3/1 to take a point from the Lane. It's been announced that Joey Barton's trial for an alleged attack on a former team-mate will commence on October 4th. I'm guessing the six-week delay is to allow the prosecution enough time to catalogue his previous form. I can't wait to take the evens for a Newcastle win over Villa. I remember when Craig Bellamy found himself in the dock after a nightclub ruck with a young female reveller. One witness testified that he was so out of control, she struggled to pull him off: we've all been there after a few ales. A little punt on the Hammers leaving St Andrews with a point at 9/4 will prove uplifting. For Steve Coppell, an outbreak of '2nd season syndrome' is the greatest threat to the dressing room since 'bird flu', although in the interest of fairness, Bellamy was acquitted. Reading can repel the manger's fears by taking a point off Everton at 9/4. If my source is to be believed, Frank Lampard will be the next high profile footballer to be arrested. Senior police officials are considering charging him with possession of an offensive relative. Portsmouth, Fulham, Manchester United and Arsenal form a 15/1 weekend accer that will raise funds for my campaign to free the Chelsea 1½. Weekend Betting: Portsmouth v Bolton Saturday 18th August 12:45 Live on Sky Portsmouth 10/11 Draw 23/10 Bolton 10/3 Get on: Portsmouth Match Special: Nugent to score with a header 6/1 Birmingham v West Ham Saturday 18th August 15:00 Birmingham 7/5 Draw 9/4 West Ham 15/8 Get on: Draw Bellamy to score in a 1-1 draw 16/1 Match Special: Fulham v Middlesbrough Saturday 18th August 15:00 Fulham 5/4 Draw 9/4 Middlesbrough 11/5 Get on: Fulham Match Special: Papa Bouba Diop to score at any time 5/1 Reading v Everton Saturday 18th August 15:00 Reading 6/4 Draw 9/4 Everton 15/8 Get on: Draw Match Special: No goalscorer in the match 17/2 Tottenham v Derby Saturday 18th August 15:00 Tottenham 1/2 Draw 3/1 Derby 15/2 Get on: Draw Match Special: Match to finish 1-1 or 2-2 9/2 Wigan v Sunderland Saturday 18th August 15:00 Wigan 5/4 Draw 9/4 Sunderland 11/5 Get on: Sunderland Match Special: Chopra to score two or more goals 10/1 Newcastle v Aston Villa Saturday 18th August 17:15 Live on Setanta Newcastle Evs Draw 12/5 Aston Villa 10/3 Get on: Newcastle Match Special: Newcastle to score three or more goals 4/1 Man City v Man Utd Sunday 19th August 13:30 Live on Sky Man City 4/1 Draw 12/5 Man Utd 4/5 Get on: Man Utd Match Special: Tevez to score direct from a free kick 9/1 Blackburn v Arsenal Sunday 19th August 15:00 Blackburn 5/2 Draw 9/4 Arsenal 5/4 Get on: Arsenal Match Special: Arsenal to score a penalty 9/2 Liverpool v Chelsea Sunday 19th August 16:00 Live on Sky Liverpool 6/4 Draw 11/5 Chelsea 2/1 Get on: Chelsea Match Special: Lampard to score from outside the penalty area 5/1 ← Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360 361 362 363 364 365 366 367 368 369 370 371 372 373 374 375 376 377 378 379 380 381 382 383 384 385 386 387 388 389 390 391 392 393 394 395 396 397 398 399 400 401 402 403 404 405 406 407 408 409 410 411 412 413 414 415 416 Next → |
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